Comments on: Quilts and Mothers-in-Law

By: HokieKate

HokieKate — Wed, 01 Aug 2012 11:48:02 +0000

I’m with Mina; I love quilts.

I suppose I’ve been fairly lucky with my mother-in-law. She has many quirks, but I don’t believe that she is overly critical of me. Living 1,100 miles away also helps.

By: Mina

Mina — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 16:18:46 +0000

Quilting culture: another topic worthy of a sustained study!

By: Carol

Carol — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 03:59:57 +0000

When my sons don’t want to do dishes or clean house, and ask why they have to, I tell them that I want my daughters-in-law to love me. It took them a few years to figure it out, but they don’t argue.

I like this moral.

By: Ardis E. Parshall

Ardis E. Parshall — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 23:48:02 +0000

You're a pain in the backside sometimes, Mark, even if you haven't become a mother-in-law! (You were asking for that, weren't you?) You're right about the didacticism, of course -- sometimes it's spelled "Q-u-i-l-t-s." But that's what I was getting at in my reply to jks: She responded to the issue being addressed by the story, ignoring shortfalls in literary quality, because the issue is a real one faced by her and others. A lot of the fiction in the Magazine is very thinly disguised moralizing concerning real problems in real women's lives. It found its audience when it triggered reflection in readers who faced whatever challenge was discussed in the story. I love the way the Magazine had something for just about every LDS woman reader, whatever her tastes and interests, and I'm trying to mirror that by posting stories from the full range of styles and subjects covered by the Magazine.

By: Mark B.

Mark B. — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 22:50:50 +0000

Oh, I love initials. It lets me rewrite comments so they make the most sense to me:

“Two of my SIL [sons-in-law] have become MIL [mothers-in-law] and they are so critical.”

Well, of course, if I became a mother-in-law I’d be an absolute pain in the backside–and I can’t blame those poor boys.

But, back to the “story”: How do you spell didactic?

By: Ardis E. Parshall

Ardis E. Parshall — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 21:25:13 +0000

Thanks for that, jks! Your comment illustrates, I think, how readers of the Relief Society Magazine would have responded to these stories and why they were published year after year.

By: jks

jks — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 19:50:49 +0000

I hope to be that kind of MIL. Two of of my SILs have become MILs and they are so critical! Since I am half a generation behind I completely side with the DILs. I want to be generous and accepting of my SILs but it is difficult to be accepting when someone is critical of another person in the family.
I see these two women thinking that no woman is good enough for their darling boy, as well as jealous that their son’s wife seems to get off easier than they used to because their sons pitch in with childcare and housework.
I also see that they make no effort to see what their DIL is doing right. I see that they think a pregnant DIL lazy when she takes a nap and her husband makes her a sandwich, and I am very well aware that when my in laws think I am “taking a nap” chances are their precious brother is really pressuring me for some hot sex which honestly I am willing to give him but it actually does require effort and energy on my part especially since I am also caring for children but unfortunately I don’t get any credit for it from the in laws….they just wonder why I’m not helping to make dinner and thinking my husband is too nice to me because any son/brother who is nice to his wife and cares about her thoughts and feelings must be being taken advantage of, otherwise he would be controlling her and making her miserable like every wife should be.
Seriously, my SIL told me she almost used me to criticize her DIL to her son and wanted to tell him “Your aunt was wondering why your wife doesn’t seem to take care of your daughter and you have to do it all.” Boy, did I stop her and tell her I fully supported and thought it was great that he helped take care of his daughter……considering she is pregnant, works full time and he is off work for the summer so should be the SAHD anyway………