Comments on: Anne Brent, Helpmate — part 6

By: ErinAnn

ErinAnn — Wed, 16 Mar 2011 03:18:07 +0000

I just want my own room!

By: Ellen

Ellen — Sat, 12 Mar 2011 04:56:17 +0000

Yeah, it would be nice if everybody could sit down and agree on the right course without subterfuge or imposing the parent’s own will, but with some personalities that is exactly the way to guarantee disaster

And often, on top of the various personalities (which may not change much in essence) is knowing that someone simply hasn’t lived long enough to know enough to make an informed decision. That part can change over time. I’ve attempted some serious tactical delay maneuvers in my day.

By: Proud Daughter of Eve

Proud Daughter of Eve — Sat, 12 Mar 2011 03:10:14 +0000

I’m struck by the bit about Phylis needing to “care for [her appearance] again.” On the one hand, it was making me think of those 1950′s books and videos that suggested things like sprucing yourself up just before DH gets home. On the other hand, it seems to me that a lot of advice today centers on taking care of your appearance, it’s just that the angle is different. Before: do it for him. Today: do it for you (and when you’re happy with you, you’ll be able to get him).

By: Ardis E. Parshall

Ardis E. Parshall — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 22:20:56 +0000

Thanks, ola. I hadn’t seen those specific results — they do confirm it was a real thing (not something made up by this author), popular, evidently, in the early 20th century. I’m still not entirely understanding the nature of the party, but every bit of evidence helps.

(Hope you don’t mind — I’m going to go behind the scenes and pretty-up your links a bit.)

By: ola senor

ola senor — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 21:59:21 +0000

I'm sure you found this - but a little search revealed this 1905 sorority record 1908 newspaper article 1909 newspaper article

By: Ardis E. Parshall

Ardis E. Parshall — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 20:48:50 +0000

Ever since I typed this up weeks ago, I’ve been trying to find a good definition of a kensington. It doesn’t appear in any of my dictionaries, and Googling doesn’t seem to help when there are so many places near Kensington, England, apparently, that specialize in party goods.

From the context, I’m guessing that it was a “work” meeting, possibly for charity, rather than strictly socializing or entertaining.

I expected a rise from that “mere wife” bit, but kew’s and Moniker’s reactions were better than my imagination!

jks, I’ve wondered what I would do in your shoes, especially after knowing a niece that my mother raised in the niece’s early years. The only way to get her to be in the youth skit once she’d announced she didn’t want to would have been to have strictly forbidden her participation with threat of serious consequences! Kids like my niece and your daughter (and maybe even Anne’s Morris) are lucky when mothers know their children so very well and can do what it takes to persuade them for their best good. Yeah, it would be nice if everybody could sit down and agree on the right course without subterfuge or imposing the parent’s own will, but with some personalities that is exactly the way to guarantee disaster.

By: mahana

mahana — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 20:35:02 +0000

The party was a kensington.

What does that mean?

By: Moniker Challenged

Moniker Challenged — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 20:34:44 +0000

Shouldn’t “Stand by Your Man” be playing in the background? *headdesk*

By: kew

kew — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 19:51:17 +0000

Ooh, I am so frustrated with that second paragraph. A mere wife would express her misgivings at her husband gambling their home and business? I’d rather be a wife with an informed opinion that matters than a helpmate that simply says “I support you in whatever, dear”.

By: jks

jks — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 19:36:55 +0000

Wow! This mom is brave. And she can apparently talk anyone into anything.
I have a 13 year old and it does seem like I see things more clearly than she does and I have to decide how to get her to make a good choice. Last week it was that she didn’t want to participate in the youth skits because she was having trouble learning the dancing. I wanted her to participate so she could see that she could do hard things plus she would have the comraderie with the other kids of doing something together. She just wanted to withdraw.
I made her. She was eventually happy.
I think as a mother you really do have a lot of power to influence your children (or family) and you have to decide how to play it and you have to be able to pull it off.
I hope she can pull it off!