That’s why I liked the author’s not arguing whether there was “sufficient cause” for the member’s having gone missing. We spend too much time and effort too often going back to root out and pin down the justice (or not) of others’ behavior instead of going forward with the way things ought to be. Doesn’t matter whether the missing member deserves a special invitation, does it, when perhaps the simple issuing of such an invitation can wipe out a complex net of misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

When I was inactive for quite some time (and I suspect for great numbers of us, the statement really is “when I was inactive,” not “if I had ever been inactive”), the obstacle to my return was as simple as not knowing what time my ward met. I didn’t want to knock on the door of some member who had ignored my existence for years and ask, because I didn’t want some sickly sweet and false welcome back, and the geography of my lot (I had a flag-shaped lot, meaning I had others’ backyards on all sides of me except for my very long, narrow driveway) meant that I couldn’t watch for other people’s leaving for church to guess the time. I had to move to a new city before I was comfortable in asking a neighbor what time church met. I know how silly that sounds as excuses go, but in my fragile state it was very real. A postcard from the RS president (since she never, ever, ever sent visiting teachers), or even somebody dropping one week’s bulletin at my door would have brought this “missing member” home a lot earlier.

Thanks, you good ol’ regulars here, for your thoughtful comments. It seems to me that this unnamed author of 1909 hits the points that matter — care about your people, notice whether they’re there or not, don’t assign blame when they aren’t there, and ask them to come back. It won’t always work. But if we can mobilize hundreds to go hunting for a stranger lost in the mountains or deserts or at sea, how big a deal is it to make a phone call or write a postcard?

I was an inactive member of the church for an extended period of time. (Well, about eight months. It seemed long.) I learned many, many things through the experience that caused the period of inactivity and met many wonderful people, including some here on the blogs.

However, it was all in all a very difficult experience.

I had not considered the point that Ray made in his closing paragraph. I certainly wouldn’t suggest inactivity, but now I can understand some of what may happen as a person stays away from church, for whatever reason, and how difficult it can be to come back. Even though there was a very clear reason for me to stay away (health related), there was not a very clear reason to return. It took a real struggle to go back. Probably very few people in my “real” (non-blogging life) would imagine that or had any idea of my struggles. If they did, they certainly didn’t show it.

The statement that they ought to return without waiting for a special invitation to do so may be perfectly true and reasonable…

It may seem perfectly true and reasonable. It’s not so obvious from the other side.

I was in a church meeting last night – a very long meeting adapted for a specific purpose. It was wonderful to hear these sentiments expressed by our stake president – with the same emotion and sincerity. He said something in deep humility that really struck me:

“A year from now, if we haven’t changed the way we are doing this, I will have failed in my stewardship.”

There was no implied condemnation of anyone; he shouldered the responsibility do be a central part of the solution in front of all the stake leaders and said much of what you quoted in this post.

Someone made a point that I liked – that those who sit in counsel to figure out why people are not active often have never been inactive – so they have no real clue personally why others are. The issue is when they try to craft solutions without any input from those they are trying to reach. It takes an extraordinary degree of humility to approach someone and ask, “What role did we play in your decision to stop coming to church – and what can we do to change so that you can feel comfortable coming back?” – but it is the way the Lord taught. (Go to the estranged brother directly and work it out with him..)

>”Do you…think old sermons…put familiar ideas in an old but attractive dress…?”
Depends. Sometimes I find them quite compelling; others I think, “there is nothing new under the sun and Sisyphus needs some Prozac.”

I like her phrase, “Every week of absence unbroken by a friendly call.”

I like how this sounds so authentic. When she recommends that we “pray earnestly” and “work resolutely”, you get the feeling that she is a woman who does exactly that.